in response to aprildsygrl...   I totaly agree with you about your sister.no offense to her but some poeple like that are depleteing our goverment funding.and then when someone who really goes to get some very needed help,they say they are all out funds.here in michigan its the DHS(social serves.wellfare,whatever its called in different states) there is also the salvation army,the community action centers.poeple take advantage of the system,then they all run out of funds.it just realy makes me mad how all the polititions in washington live so very very well,they need to sacrifise too&add some thier enormous salaries to our state run programs.to help the homeless,the poeple living without electricity.i,4 yrs ago went without heat from Dec.1st through Jan.30th.

To the attention of:

US Senators from West Virginia: Joe III Manchin, John D. IV Rockefeller;
US Representatives from West Virginia: David B. McKinley, Nick J. II Rahall, Shelley Moore Capito;
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Mr. Manchin, I know your uncle when he was in office. I was a waitress in a club he visited every Sunday. I have to say he would be very disapointed in what is happining to the working class,disabled, and elderly people of WV. Everything goes to the able bodied non working person, 52 million dollors of the stimules money was thrown at the people on welfare, in a two weekl period, the same month the letter went out to inform the people getting SS and SSI that they would not get a raise the following year. that is tax payers money. why could the people on SS that worked thier lives and paid into it not get any of it. the average person around here got between  $2000. to $4000. just because the state was rushed to spend it so they would not have to return it. The crack dealers got most of it. Why would anyone get a job in WV . You are better off not working, you get free rent, food stamps, money to get a ride to drug clinic to pick up your goverment drugs to sell. dentle and medical . go to pain clinic . get more drugs to sell. free phone , utilites, everything is handed to these lazy people, when the working people can not even get a medical card for their children. I am sitting here now, a single mother of 3 two special needs children. one teen that has no medical insurance, my income is to high for any help under the guidlines. I was on the gas budget, last year, I get sick in Dec, was in bed until March. my yearly budget had to be paid in full. it was 1,174.92. I had not been able to work, I have to boil water to bathe my children and wash dishes, I have two unhealthy children, I have no heat, I can not get my gas on . This is not fair. It is as though I am being punnished for working 

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Post Open Letter to your Elected Representatives

Hello,  I feel the energy you put out others must love to be around you.

Thankyou for sharing.  This is so nice to hear. 

I am so proud to say my oldest son is GrADUATING hIGH sCHOOL THIS YEAR!  Not bad for a single Mom of 5, Just wanted to share some positive with everyone who is raising kids alone. All we hear is The negative. My son is a good kid and He is going to College too ! Nice to see hard work paying off, Makes it all worth it ! Does any other single parents have some positive to share?

Hi,

 I know it is hard right now. First, congratulations on being a someone who works hard. It would probably be easier on you to quit your job and live off the government while attending school. You are definitely a hard worker as is evident by raising two children, college, and a full time job. That is a very stressful life. However, I have been where you are and know how you feel. In my case i lived on 1200 a month while attending Virginia Tech full time and supported 3 stomachs. One thing I had was family. I had to bite the bullet and move into a very old and dilapidated trailer for 3 years in order to make it. If you have family do not be to proud to seek assistance from them. In time past this was the norm in America. You should really think outside the box on how to cut cost. I remember that I would watch the grocery adds and was sometimes able to by the staples to get through the week for 50 dollars. We ate a lot of beans and chicken drums. Very little beef as it was to expensive. In reality 1600 a month is doable. Many families make do with less. Your situation is short term. Also, you should have no problem finding a college educated career making 17 or more dollars per hour. Unless you are getting a degree in basketweaving. I left that lifestyle 10 years ago and our household income is now 136,000 per year. My first year out of college we had income of 60,000 per year. I am extremely grateful that I found a way to stay in college. No matter what tighten your belt and keep the dream of the future and the next couple of years will pass and life will get much better. Your just paying your dues right now. It is hard but nothing worthwhile is easy. STAY IN SCHOOL as it is the fastest way up. Take care.

http://singleparents.meetup.com/cities/us/ny/buffalo/

Check the link for single dad's and mom's ...............

Having been a single parent I am putting forth a few website resources directed at single parents.

http://www.pwphouston.org/05singleparentsites.htm

Parents without partners operates nationwide but this is the Houston, Texas site that has other resources listed. They seem to be in working order and offer at least a starting point for those who are recently divorced/separated.

http://www.parentswithoutpartners.org/chapterfind.asp

This is the main website for parents without partners which offers a search engine to find a chapter in your area.

http://singleparentsnetwork.com/

This is a great website for single moms and single fathers, but as their mission states it is all about the children. It features a community area, newsletter, and articles that I found to be very useful.

 http://www.singlemoms.org/

M.O.M.S. is an international organization for single moms, dad, widowers, widows and grandparents. They are moving websites but offer an email service to get you in contact with local chapters.

http://www.singleparent411.org/index.htm

S.P.A.R.C. is a 501 (3)(c) non-profit organization whose goal is to equip all single parents with the resources and tools they need as single parents.

http://www.rainbows.org/

Rainbows for All Gods Children is a program to help children deal with the loss of a parent through death or through divorce/separations. This website is the main website but you can find locals in your area by doing a search off the main website.

http://www.ccspm.org/office_separated_divorced.aspx

Catholic Charities sponsors a group called Divorced and Separated. This is for the Twin Cities area, but you can simply search Catholic Charities main website for a group near you. They offer counseling after divorce, etc.

I am a 32 year old Mother of 2 kids age 6 and 8, My son is disabled not a physical disablity but ADHD and he is on medication but I really want to stop and start this thereputic medicine but I have no knowledge of where I can get that. So if anyone know of any service that provide thereputic medicine in Texas any where in the Houston area please respond back. 

Koppi, you really enjoy taking a long time to say absolutely nothing don’t you. Nice of you to completely ignore snorks’ request to leave that deuchebag faith philosophy out of it too. Snorks doesn’t need confidence nor does she need a stupid superstition to help her ignore the elephant in the room. She needs advice of what SHE can do to fix her problem. If you think that by ignoring the elephant in your house that God will make it go away, go right ahead and keep thinking that, TO YOURSELF. Koppi you are a jerk. Not the kind of jerk who’s like a bully, but the old fashion use of the word that means town idiot.

Snorks, I was raised by my mom and at about the age of 14 she married a guy as a last chance at more kids and a hope to get out of poverty. For what it’s worth, I want to encourage your conviction to not marry for the same reasons. My stepfather ended up convincing her numerous times to throw me out of the house just because he wanted to pitch some random fit. My mom’s stubbornness and stupidity coupled with that asshole’s instinctive need to dispose of the kid who wasn’t his are major factors as to why at the age of 26 I still can’t get work that would be enough to support myself independently.

At 18 I had to join the military after high school because I couldn’t trust my mom to not throw me out at any random moment. Before that I was a student with a gift for understanding complex concepts like in math and science but I was held back by a learning disability that only causes me to take longer than most people to read and write. If I had a descent opportunity in education I could have had a PhD in physics before I was 18, but the public school system put the responsibility in my mom to request and sign for the free testing that would have proved that. I made her promise me that she would look into it when I was in 3rd grade, but she never did. I served the Air Force for 3 years and ended up leaving before the end of my term with the old “personality disorder” excuse because the situation I was placed in by the military financially crippled me and my supervisors got tired of me trying to climb the chain of command to get them to do the right thing. All I had to tell the psychologist was that I was stressed and I was out. It took another 2 years before I could get the military to follow through on my education benefit and they coincidentally “lost” and refused to investigate the paperwork that proved I signed up for the kicker which would pay me $600 per month more to go to school. The proof is on file at Randolf AFB, TX right now, but they wont look at it or give me a copy unless ordered to. 

I moved back in with my mom and stepdad after that until I was kicked out by another random fit that included him threatening to bash me with a hammer and somehow they finally came to their senses and let me live with them on a $300 per month rent when I showed up at my mom’s work with a pummeled face that had been beaten in by my roommate’s (the roommate my mom begged to take me in) boyfriend and his buddy over a false rumor that she spread about me for attention. I got a sweet job and went to community college and last January I transferred to a university with a great reputation. However, I’m currently broke because the school and the federal government make it impossible for poor people to make it at this college without getting work. The quarter system here and the fact that disabled services require loads of proof (and loads of money spent to get that proof) before they take care of you, even if you’re a paraplegic and can’t move without their help, has also made it hard for me.

I, like you snorks, have made it through a lot but do not know what I can do to fix my current situation. For what it’s worth, I do have some good advice to help you with based on my experiences. When I was 14 and foresaw my mom’s immanent abandonment at 18and I thought of getting my GED and going straight to college. Mom wouldn’t let me do it, but as I went through community college I saw firsthand that it would have been better if I had. High school wastes time and focuses on how much work gets produced, not on how much education is learned. College doesn’t waste your time with anything and only tells you to learn enough to pass the midterms and finals however you like. There’s also free tutoring that is offered at most community colleges.

I would recommend that you get your boys to look into passing the GED and going to the nearest community college. You can go check in advance as to what bureaucratic hoops you have to jump through to get them accepted. They are there, you just have to ignore the jerks who give you a hard time about it and keep asking. You should even be able to get them student loans as long as they are accepted as students, but a few more barriers might be in place for not being 18. Keep looking for the loopholes, they are there.

When each of them turns 15, you should encourage your boys to find work that will lead them to jobs which are renowned for getting poor people through college, like waiting or bartending. You yourself might want to look into such things if you can in any spare time that you have. Waiting tables at a good restaurant should get you more than $12.50 after you add tips. Some waiting positions get people as much as $25 per hour, and no, I’m not talking about strip clubs or Hooters. While you are at it I recommend that you teach your boys how to make a resume, store important information for future resumes and applications, and teach them how to do their taxes when the time comes.

The son who has difficulty should be able to get free testing at the college and should be able to get time and a half or double the about of time that other students get on tests along with a few other perks. The majors that I have learned are great for quick and easy money to support yourself with are Biology, Programing, Economics, and Accounting. I’ve been a Physics major, but right now, as I’m in dire straights, I’m regretting the act of holding onto my dreams because the only money out there for physics are the ones who complete the bachelors. Until that point you can still get screwed over like I am now.

If either som finds that they are good at math or science it wouldn't hurt for them to gain experience in tutoring by volunteering at the college tutoring center. It can pay well to tutor privately, but it's difficult to get enough clients and maintain them. Some tutoring companies however are doing a great job at getting work for tutors while paying them $15-25 per hour. 

 Learning a second language can also benefit all of you financially, but the learning part isn't easy. If you all agree to learning the same language together it could make it a lot easier since you can practice with each other on your free time. You can email me for some info on free self help on learning second languages as well as some advice on getting other sources of self teaching one in less conventional ways if you would like.

Finally, the most important thing to keep in mind is family. People who succeed in life require some aspect of that luxury to do so. When you look at people who survive with fewer protections and rights, like illegal immigrants, the way they thrive is by supporting their family so that their family can help to support them. Never forget that. All I have, and not for the lack of trying to be a good son and citizen, are close relatives who can manage to borrow as much as $700 but refuse to even give me $5 for food in my time of need.

Oh and one more thing, you might try seeking advice on a better website. This stupid page deleted my message to you like 5 times already.

I'm a Swedish junior level teacher, residing in Israel since 14 years. I'm a teacher from my soul and heart, and I love children and teaching (in that order: - )!

I was born to Swedish landowners and grew up on a farm with both agriculture and stock. There I got my love for animals, an interest that I took up as a grown up. I now have one Persian cat and two motherless kittens that I stumbled over a year ago: - )

Since I came to Israel, I have returned to my profession. I now teach English and computer to 250 pre-schoolers in a private nursery school. I have a part time job and the Israeli salaries are only a fraction of Swedish incomes. Frugal living has become my second nature, by necessity. I try to make the best of what I have and not to drown in expenses: - )

I stayed here during wars as well as earthquakes, became a victim of crime in 2005 (escalated domestic violence), divorced in 2006 and re-invented my life completely - and to my satisfaction. I now live with my four children aged 9 to 18.

I have two elderly parents in Sweden, who take care of each other, and with whom I have weekly contact over the phone. (They still don't feel confident enough to use computers...: - )

My interests are: reading, writing, helping people, analyzing problems, trying to find solutions (part of my job as a teacher), organizing summer activities for children, visiting or going out with friends, caring for my cats, writing on the cat forums, going to the mall and having a nice lunch and reading a book, computers, internet surfing, learning new things all the time, cooking, frugal living, educating children, doing things with my children, organizing the house and daily life, budgeting.

These are true facts you state, at times i feel the same way and see the same thing. But first of all, you shouldn't have to support your kids along, you didn't make them by your self. Put the Father on child support and that will help you out some.unfortually bad things happens to good people.But I'm happy that you stood up for your child and got out the realtionship.Prayers and you keep being strong and believe in God.You will make it.At times it seems hard but you have to keep on doing what you do in order to better your situation  for your self.You being you, and having that state of mind will see you through it, and at the end you will be smiling, because you didn't fall for what the world is trying to feed you.keep on keeping on and look for answers within your self, thats where it all starts ...have a bless day

   As I write this, I don’t know if any one will ever even read it, or understand it. But I feel the need to tell my story, to ask my question, because I am just so desperate to find the answer, if the truth is out there, somewhere, I want to find it.

   I am a 45 year old single mother raising two teenage boys on my own. They are 14 and 16 years old. Before you go judging me for “choosing” to be a single parent….you should know that I was married to a man that I believed was a good man, and after we married, we had two sons together. Then I found out that he was sexually abusing one of the children, and so I had to leave to protect my children.

   My question is this…how is a single person supposed to earn enough to support a family of three? I work and I also attend college. I earn about $12.50 per hour at my current job.  In the state I live in I don’t qualify for ANY type of assistance, because in Utah, $12.50 per hour is a “good” job, and I earn
too much” to get food stamps, or housing assistance, or help with insurance, or even school lunch for my kids.

   After taxes, I only take home about 1,600 per month. From that, I have to pay rent, car, insurance, utilities and food, and most times, there really isn’t enough for all of that. In Utah, the average rent for a 3 bedroom apartment is at least $800 (if you’re lucky.) No one will rent me a two bedroom apartment, because of the ages of my children. In Utah, utilities are very expensive, as is gas and food.

   I am going to school to help myself, hoping that I will not always be in this desperate situation, but I am beginning to see that it is futile. Once my kids are grown and moved out (if they can afford to move out!) I will still need a roof overhead, and my oldest son, he has a disability, and I am not sure when he will ever learn to drive, and work and become independent.

   I figured out that I need to earn at least 17.00 per hour, just to squeak by once I graduate, and of course figuring in pay back on the student loan (classes at USU are over about $900 per class, no book included!) and to be honest, I just don’t even know how it can be done. What are the chances I will even get a job that pays 17 dollars per hour in Utah, and even then, that’s just to get by…

   Most friends, relatives, and co-workers have a two income family, and are earning twice what I earn, and there are a few, where the husband just is a high earner, and if the wife works, that income is for “fun” money.

    Many, many woman I know seem to marry or otherwise “hook-up” with men, (or even stay with abusive men) just because they know they have to in order to pay the bills, and take care of the kids. I am not here to judge them, but as for me, I just can’t have a relationship or marry someone because I need his income. I think that is a horrible reason to be with someone.

   So I struggle with the thought…”is this really as good as it gets for me?” Sometimes I feel sickened that It really does take $17.00 per hour just to provide the basics of living. I went onto a government website today just to see….maybe I am way off.  That website said that it costs a family of three 36,000 per year (gross income) to even have the basics…food, housing, utilities, medical and transportation, and they were only figuring 500 per month for housing. There is no housing in Utah for 500 per month.

   Sometimes I read study and ponder and try to find the answer….please don’t tell me that faith is the answer. I think faith is a beautiful thing, and I believe miracles do happen, however, in my life, I have not been the recipient of good fortune, or “karma”, and “faith” will not pay my bills. (I tried to pay my electric bill with a note that said “just have faith….good things come to those who wait! ” but that didn’t work! J )

   I really don’t want a loan….I’m not here to borrow money. I just want answers, suggestions and experience, strength and hope. How do other people do it? I guess I just so want to believe that it can be better, that it will be better someday. I just have to have hope for a brighter future in order to go on. (bluejay63@gmail.com)

I saw an article in the newspaper saying that there are scholarships available for working moms to study online.  Although some of the deadlines are past, there are lots of links to more info on aid available to low-income and single parents.  Go to http://www.elearners.com/projectworkingmom/ to learn more!

Best wishes,

Rosie

Save up to 80% on healthcare at http://www.BenefitsByRosie.com

Single parent of a 8 yr old who desperatly wnat to go back to school.  I already have exhausted my resources on federal financial aid and loans that are in forberance.I have been searching online and can not tell the difference between gimick and real grant websites - HELP.